Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
Haha im sorry. Its just financially responsiable to bang him instead of you right now.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
he told me that I'm basically going to be the mom of the house when they move in...i like to see it as being a MILF without the responsibility of real children
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
I just ordered a five person drink for myself.... Right about now you should start saving me from myself....
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
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