Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(865): View more from Tennessee

he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.

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(802): View more from Vermont

clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?

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(401): View more from Rhode Island

i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?

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(573): View more from Missouri

You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.

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(386): View more from Florida

Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.

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(716): View more from New York

Are we on the same shift tomorrow and more importantly do you want your pants back?

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(512): View more from Texas

He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered

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