I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Also, I might need your help for a prank involving a hand puppet, a coke bottle, double-sided tape, and my dick...
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Who the fuck is "nick from the beach last year"
No idea hahaha...why?
He just texted me.. Should I ask where I met him?
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
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