I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Jizz is so healthy, they should sell it at Jamba Juice. Call it "Jamba's Juice". Genius.
i think i just put your shirt on , but i don't remember . my body can't decide if it wants to move in slow motion or fast forward
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
I don't really know I'm just giving her a key to get back in and the "don't get pregnant speech" and leaving it at that.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
Apparently she buried shit in the snow back in January and now that it's melted I found a flip flop, 4 spoons, a bottle of smirnoff, and 14 different candy bars
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Randomize
