we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
Just heard a guy on the phone saying " ya ill buy the eight ball " then came to my register to ask what asile the sugar substitute is on.
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Dude you were sitting in front of me eating uncooked bow tie pasta...
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
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