my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Holy. Shit. I just remembered all the lapdances....
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
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