The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I think I actually have rug burn on my eye.
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
The reason why I poison my organs is so that you guys can't sell them.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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