Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
