I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
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