i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
Randomize
