oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
Even my conscience is telling me to take this Wednesday's exam buzzed.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize