last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
17 year olds will be the death of me.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
dude, shes trippin so bad. idk what shes on, she just told me she doesnt remember her name then proceeded to get in the shower clothed to try to "rinse off the high"
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
