You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize