i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
I assume you passed out however I'm drinking jäger and beer in bed with my cat so your friendship world have been appreciated
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
They have beer where we have blood.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
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