.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
The dorm having an ice machine is their way of inviting us to make mixed drinks.
Btw, do you want me to fix this with a box of wine and a chick flick or is this more of a 'lets head to the strip club' problem? I'm just trying to analyze the emotional depth of the situation.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
