It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
I like that we've become good enough friends again that I can make fun of your penis without it being awkward
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
Thought the acid was fake. Then my reflection didn't move when I did in the bathroom.
Randomize
