oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
I wish I was a guy so I could jack myself off anytime I wanted to
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
I just instagramed a picture of an ostrich in case you were wondering what I did with my night
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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