Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
