Christians are straight up FREAKS
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize
