Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
He really likes Obama...and Bill Clinton too. He said "I mean, how many presidents can say that they got head in the oval office?"
Soulmates.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
I'm glad you trust me to be your sex stat keeper.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Are sex swings allowed in dorms
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Randomize
