I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I don'y know if I should feel accomplished or disgusted. I just ate a dozen cookies all to myself. I'm leaning more towards accomplished.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
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