whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
I can't get a boner in the bathroom of a buffet.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
You're a waste of cheezeits
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
Randomize
