i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I felt like in order for him to make it to mordor and destroy the ring, he'd have to make sweet sweet love to me in some form of hut or cave.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
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