they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
He's giving me the absolute bare minimum amount of attention. Like whatever motherfucker, I've had like six super likes on tinder today
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
