what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
Half my face is frozen, my vagina is broken, I'm wearing only gym shorts eating a plate of mashed potatoes, avatar is on my tv. There's a naked guy on my couch whose name idk. I needa talk to you asap
Maybe I'll just get really drunk on valentines day and tell him I think his penis is small
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
I actually just took 17 pictures of some guy at the gas station that needs to marry me now
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
Randomize