Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
I changed the background on my phone to a picture of you so whenever I go to look at porn or text another girl I'll have second thoughts
Am I supposed to find that romantic?
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like running into your ex boyfriend at the liquor store at 3 in the afternoon.
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