Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
I am scared. I picture you doing a keg stand on a sinking ship with hula girls cheering you on. Please text me when you get back to shore...or now would be good
at least he left the skimmer on the side of the pool so i could fish out my thong in the morning
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I'm daydrinking whiskey in a princess hat
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
I had to remind him last night as he had his arm around me, "We hook up, we don't cuddle!"
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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