Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
I woke up in my own vomit, a chunk of cactus in my thigh, shirtless, with jons mom poking at me with a glass of dr pepper and a talk about god....damn alcohol
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
We thought we had lost her until we found her in the bushes a block away singing "Jingle Bells".
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
I just threw up birthday cake.. who's birthday was it?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
I cannot take an uber back in my costume...can you please come get me?
Randomize
