Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I am watching Grease 2 and properly learning how to apply a condom to a banana. This is a sign from God that this is the closest I will ever get to having the need for one.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
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