When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
well, if it gives you any insight into how crazy it was, i am currently wikipediaing "anullment"
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
After grabbing my boob for a couple minutes he then decides to ask me if I was awake.
Just cause I'm shitfaced wasted every night waking up in random beds all over Manhattan does not mean I'm a mess.
Truth. Respect the hustle.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
well it was naive of you to actually think you're the only bday sex he had lined up for him today. I'm just suprised he actually had a line forming outside of his room
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
The only thing I remember about us having sex is yelling at him to choke me.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize
