she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
They had their heads out of the car singing the wrong words to the national anthem as we drove through traffic of people leaving the fireworks. AMURICA
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
Had a dick customer and the words "eat my ass" slipped out. He proceeded to lick his lips and say present it. I think it's time I quit.
Randomize
