U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
we were playing true or dare on a webcam chat and i was way to drunk ...i ended up having to drink my own piss outta a beer bottle, life couldnt get any worse right now
they said he just opened the front of his shirt and threw up alll over himself
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
How do you not remember?? She kept putting a dollar on her waistband and insisting it was all you can eat under a dollar
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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