I wanna get so drunk next week I throw up on a guy's genitals. I want to be that memorable for someone.
Has now officially visited every ER in this city in one semester.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
