so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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