vagina is talking i cant
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
She tied me up with her honor cords...
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
