so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
I'm confused about why you felt the need to ask me to buy you life alert for christmas at 3:28 this morning.
Found a pic of me suckling your nipple at the bar. Safe to say you don't want this one tagged?
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
Sex should always be followed by Chinese food in bed.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
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