I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
dude you made out with his girlfriend and stole his credit card to buy more drinks
well when you put it that way, I sound like a terrible person
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
somehow this turned into a costume party you have to get here now with my banana suit or I'm wearing my birthday suit
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
I sent him a topless photo and he complimented my eyes. I'm not sure if I'm offended or pleasantly surprised.
You were so fucked you introduced me to a pile of Laundry
I wondered why I slept in the front room
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
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