belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
