i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
First rule of pills: If you can't remember what it is, take half.
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
Just read the 12 signs you're a horrible roommate post and fucking in your roommate's bed wasn't on the list, so I'm a pretty awesome roommate.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize