I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
the toilet has never flushed louder then when you sneak home drunk and try to avoid your parents hearing you puke.
I walked in on him shirtless licking the mirror while talking to his reflection. So yes, I definitely want to do shrooms the next time you get them.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Randomize
