is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I have got to stop getting laid on my lunch breaks. I AM SO HUNGRY RIGHT NOW.
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
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