i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Just witnessed a bar fight started by a guy wearing a construction vest cuz he didn't like the other guys shirt
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Randomize
