you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Showing girls my stab wound was not the brilliant idea I thought it was.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I think you're my feminist conscience sometimes.
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
Randomize
