I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I think pretend fucking a camel is a good thing to do downtown. They loved me.
I used to think not drinking while I was pregnant was not gonna be a problem, but I now I'm like shit that's a long time
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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