Me too!
And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
I wish we never smoked. I'm literally laying in bed opening and closing my eyes, just hoping a hot dog stand will appear in the room.
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
Get here now. This is going to be possibly my most dangerous idea ever, and I'm the guy who challenged a hobo to a breakdance fight.
Cognac is not meant to be taken in shots. I just wanted you to know the desperation of last night.
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
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