ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
I just gate-crahed a party and met a state senator, so I had an interesting afternoon jog.
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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