This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
