For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I'be color coordinated the clothes in my closet and my underwear drawer. I'm like an advertisement for house arrest. Help.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Just saw a woman in bootie shorts and a winter coat at the library. God. Bless. Prostitutes.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
