I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
Well, love is in the air. And by that I mean: it seriously smells like sex in here.
What can I say? I like my food like I like my women, not entirely fucked by our contemporary world.
Currently cooking 3lbs of bacon in case the power goes out bc if even one slice of bacon goes to waste then sandy wins
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
I never thought it would be so hard to find a power hour partner at 2 on a Wednesday
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
Randomize
