you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
Puking in the Ritz Carlton bathroom was actually kind of a nice experience
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
Come over. We have half a bottle of jumbo champagne left and no boyfriends to slow us down
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